ONE EIGHT YEAR-OLD BOY
For immediate sale, one nearly nine year old boy.
Does not like school in any way, shape, or form.
Delights in being the boss of his brothers.
Doesn't particularly like going to bed when told OR getting up with everyone else in the morning.
Consistently sprinkles when he tinkles.
Wants to grow his hair long like all the ragamuffin looking pre-teen boys.
Likes to play with messy toys with small parts such as Legos and K'Nex, in addition to creating junk with trash also resulting in a mess.
Did I mention he doesn't like school?
All reasonable offers will be considered, including a perfect little girl who sits still during school hours, plays dollies instead of war or hunting, and doesn't think fart noises are hilarious.
All sales final.